The Voice of a Diary
by Pasp14
Summary: I am Isabella Swan and like any of you I want to matter. I am not voiceless but nobody listens, I am not invisible but nobody can see me. After graduation, I am going to matter. I have to!
1. The Voice of a Diary 1

11/21/2002

Hi Diary,

My name is Isabella Marie Swan, and you are my new Diary. I have kept a diary since I was 5, my parents aren't always around. My Diary is my only refuge, who listens, who understands and will never leave me. Since you're new, I'll tell all about me. I'm 18 now, I love the color green, I play the piano, I'm an avid reader but not fan of the classics. I prefer J.R.R Tolkien to Jane Austen. My friends call me Bella, but I always sign my name as Isabella whenever I write on my diary I feel like that name suits me better. My parents are on a business meeting in Paris for a week I'm home alone writing in my diary. I was born with a golden spoon, the maids here are who I'm always with. My parents keep on telling me that they are doing this for my future, for my life to be better, to give me a better life. What they don't know is, they are all I need. I need my parents, they were never there. When I first scraped my knee, when I first learned to walk, to run, to play the piano, to go to parent-teacher meetings, to see me grow up. They just.. weren't there. Most teens at school envy me for my beautiful car, my clothes, my shoes, my bags, and all my material things. They will never understand my need for affection because they always had it while growing up. Meanwhile, I am raised to be independent, to be mature and to do all things on my own. I never got to ask my parents " Why is the sky blue? Who created the stars?" they simply don't have the time or probably just don't care. I have a best friend, her name is Angela. Her boyfriend is Ben. Graduation is near! I'll be living in New York! Yay! Can you believe it? Ofcourse you'll be there! Some of my things are being shipped as I write this down. Angela is going there too, we are already enrolled at Columbia University and Ben is there too. I have a great feeling about this, hopefully my feelings are correct.

Isabella

AN: Good Day to everyone! I am writing this story in hopes of helping parents, families to understand or probably take a peek of what it is inside a teenagers mind. And of course to teenagers who want their parents to understand them and want to be close to them as much as possible. As a teenager and a writer you need to be everything your imagination is permitting you to be. My story is the complete opposite of me, I am very much close to my parents, I can rely whatever is in my mind. But like most families ours is not perfect either. I will be so happy to help you out, just leave me a PM or Review and I will answer you in a form of a story in Isabella's Diary.


	2. The Voice of a Diary 2

05/03/2003

Hi Dairy,

I know I should be living in the real world, let me just be for now. It's been 5 months since I moved away from my parents but I can't truly be happy for myself it feels like something is pulling me down. Drowning me.. My parents moved in close to me, two hours away from my apartment. I think my parents want to make amends for all the years they were MIA. Buying furniture for my apartment with me, movie nights before school starts, constant calls, stories lots of them about me when I was young, it was surreal. I feel like I'm going to wake up sometime soon and _poof!_ I'm alone again, parentless, voiceless, invisible. Angela told me to let them, have a fresh start in a new place. I never lost hope that someday, I will matter and I think I do now.

Isabella

I close my Diary and think of the reasons why my parents are suddenly the best parents in the world. I know I need to savor the moment and live through it. I can't 'coz I don't know how, this is very foreign to me. I don't know how to react, how to embrace them with open arms and just let it be. A part of myself is protecting me building walls to secure me inside, I can't help it..

My phone rings, _Angela Weber._

"Angela." I say through the receiver.

"Bella! You have to come here at school now!" Angela says

"What? Why?" I ask

"Your parents are here." She whispers

"Why are you whispering?" I whispered back "I just saw them awhile ago. They came to visit me here in my apartment."

"They are announcing something, they told me to call you and be here in 10 minutes!" she replies

"Announcing what?" I panicked, this is probably it. Why they have been so good to me..

"Just be here." She hangs up.

 _Uh oh.._

AN: Good Day to everyone! I am writing this story in hopes of helping parents, families to understand or probably take a peek of what it is inside a teenagers mind. And of course to teenagers who want their parents to understand them and want to be close to them as much as possible. As a teenager and a writer you need to be everything your imagination is permitting you to be. My story is the complete opposite of me, I am very much close to my parents, I can rely whatever is in my mind. But like most families ours is not perfect either. I will be so happy to help you out, just leave me a PM or Review and I will answer you in a form of a story in Isabella's Diary.


	3. The Voice of a Diary 3

Just when I arrived Angela was waiting for me at the parking lot.

"Angela what is going on?" I ask panicking.

"I don't know either but we'll know when we get there. " she answers

"Where are they?" I ask jogging beside her.

"They are at the Dean's office." She answers then runs to the corridor

"The Dean's? Patrick?" I keep on inquiring

"I don't know Bella. We have to find out." She says as we reach the Dean's office.

"Mom. Dad." I say cooly

"Baby, it's about time you arrive." Mom says kissing my cheeks

"We want you to meet someone." Dad takes my hand and ushers me to the man in the middle.

He looks so familiar but I can't put a name on his face. He is tugging his wild bronze hair, he's been doing that for awhile it may seem. His green eyes are looking at me calmly, the complete opposite of his unruly and perfectly disarrayed hair. He is about to open his mouth when Patrick clears his throat.

"Bella." our Dean Patrick Hernandez says. Patrick is 25 years old, he has been showing signs of affection since I arrived here in Columbia. Always near, hovering, small touches. It was everything but subtle. Looks like green eyes knows as well as he narrows his eyes and purses his lips. _Jealous? Mad? Annoyed?_

"Mr. Hernandez, I never knew that you know my parents." I say while looking at him amused all of a sudden.

"Patrick, Bella. Please always call me Patrick. I know a lot of things about you Bella." He says while smiling. _His stare should be flattering but it's giving me the creeps. Brrrrr_

"Sorry, Patrick." I smile back.

Green eyes clears his throat.

"Mr. Hernandez, thank you for lending us your office. You may leave now." Green eyes says.

"Of course Mr. Masen." Patrick nods at me and my parents before exiting the room.

"You as well, Ms. Weber." ' ' says. _What is happening that needs to be –oh-so-private?_

"Ok. Call me later Bella." Angela says while leaving. "I will." I say

"Honey, we need to tell you something important." Mom says coming close to me and holding my hand.

 _I know *imaginative eyeroll*_

"What is it mom?" I inquire

"Our family business is on the verge of bankruptcy." Dad says quietly

"What? Why? How?" I can't seem to rein the disbelief in as Dad continues to speak.

"Our major stock holders are leaving one by one. I don't know what to do. You know what happens when our budget is not funded. We will lose our company." Dad says while pacing the room.

 _I've never seen him like this before. Who am I kidding I never see them so often._

"That is why we have been with you for some time now sweetie. We want you to help us save our company." Mom says while holding both of my hands tightly and looking into my eyes.

 _This company is their life.. What will happen if we lose it? Will I lose my parents too? Their sanity? Their embarrassment? Their integrity?_ Then I realize, I would do anything for them. They are my parents. I have to.

"I'll do everything in my power mom." I say smiling a little.

"That is where Mr. Masen comes in Honey." Mom says "He will help us save the company too."

"Oh! I forgot to introduce you two!" Mom says briskly "Bella this is Edward Masen."

 _Edward..? I know him from somewhere but I really can't place his face anywhere._

"Hi Mr. Masen." I say while holding out my hand still confuse. "Thank you for helping us."

"Edward is the youngest billionaire here in New York sweetie. He agreed to help us but for a price." Dad says standing in front of me directly.

"What price? I thought he is helping." I say taking my hand out Edward's grasp that I forgotten he was holding. "I am Isabella." Edward says taking my hand again. I tried to pull it out but he is holding onto it tightly.

"Marry me, and I will save your company." He says

 _Marriage?_

I gasp

"I'm too young to be married. I'm only 18! I don't even know you!" I say my voice beginning to raise.

"Your parents and I compromised. They will give me a week to court you and get to know you more." Edward says while kissing my hand. "Please accept Isabella. I will make you happy, you wont ask for a thing." He promises

 _Don't faint. Breathe.. breathe.._

"Ok." I say sealing my fate.

05/04/2003

Diary,

I can't sleep. The happenings this afternoon is still bugging me to no end. I don't know what to do. I want to save my family's company but I don't want to get married at the same time. It's creeping me out. But Edward, he is so beautiful. Otherworldy beauty. His voice is like velvet on my skin. His eyes are promising. His hand is soft . _So soft…_ He smells so divine. He is a deal breaker for me. He makes me want to say yes to all of his commands. I'm getting married. Court or no. I can never say no to a man like him. What if I'm not enough? I know I'm beautiful but is it enough for him to hold onto me forever? For him to ask marriage and dive into a situation just like that? Something tells me to go for it. But a very distinct feeling tells me to be careful. And here I am again Diary. Hoping, praying that this time, I will matter to someone. To that otherworldy creature nonetheless. Sweet dreams or a beautiful nightmare?

Isabella

Disclaimer: Twilight is not mine.


	4. Day 1 of Courtship

**Day 1 of Courtship**

"Bella are you ready? It's almost time for Edward to be here." Mom says through my bedroom door.

"Yes mom! Just some final touches." I say putting on my earrings.

"Okay, honey. Come down if you're done."

I twirl around in front of the mirror.

 _Do I look okay? Too sophisticated? Too casual?_

I doubt you'll be able to fit in with a billionaire. _Edward Masen more importantly.._

 _Today will be perfect it has to be! My future lies on his hands.._

I hear the doorbell ring as I come down from my room. _My apartment is a two-storey building._

"Good Morning Mrs. Swan." Edwards greets my mom while smiling a heart stopping smile. _Geez Mom.._

"Such a gentleman Edward, but I'll have you know my Bella is quite infatuated with you." Mom says making my eyes wide

"Mom!" I whisper-yell.

Edward laughs "I don't think Isabella agrees with you Mrs. Swan."

"Pfft! I saw you twirling in front of the mirror darling. I know that look, you are nervous." Mom says trying to soften the blow by reasoning out.

"Nervous because I'm getting married to a man I barely know!" I face my mom.

"Isabella, I will tell you everything you want to know." Edward says coming to me and holding my hand then kisses it. "You are so beautiful you can mesmerize anyone with one look."

I blush.

Edward laughs "See? I am besotted already. It's very addicting. You are."

 _Addicting? Besotted?_

Never in my entire life have I heard those words from my father to my mother. From the looks of it he really is besotted. Sparks in his eyes, smile on his lips, joy written all over his face.

"Shall we start our day Isabella?" Edward says holding my hand tightly.

"Okay. Bye Mom." I kiss moms cheeks

"Bye Baby, have fun okay? But not too much!" she says as she waves us out of the door.

"Don't worry Renee. I don't bite…hard." Edward winks _winks at my mom!_ That's just so _ughhh_ _gross_.

"You heard him Mom, I'm perfectly safe from his fangs." I laugh

Mom laughs "Honey, just be careful okay? Take care."

"We will Renee." Edward promises.

05/05/2003

Dear Diary,

Edward is wonderful. We ate breakfast at a Restaurant called _Lovers. Cliché huh?_ He was the perfect gentleman. Opening doors, pulling out chairs. He is always watching me. It's very powerful like it can protect me wherever I am. It's very promising, his eyes are like open doors. It feels warm and secure. I don't know how to say this but I think he is slowly crushing the walls that I made for myself. I know I just knew him yesterday but it feels like I've been with him forever. It's scaring me Dairy, I'm on a 'No Return' zone. He makes me laugh, I feel free with him. He makes me feel important. He makes me feel beautiful. How many woman can say that? Not all I suppose. But I know I need to have a clear and level head when I'm with him. Marriage is too soon for my liking he needs to work hard to get me. It's the only way he can keep me. After eating our breakfast, we went to his parents house. Edward said "I want my parents to meet my future.. future wife." _*winks*_ Very drool worthy I know!  
His Mom Elizabeth and Edward Sr were very welcoming. His moms first words were "Is that my daughter Edward?" _Charming.. very charming_ His Dad was like "Welcome Home dear. Don't make us wait too long." _Gosh.. he looks so handsome too *drools*_ I never felt so out of place and yet very welcomed before. It was a battle of mixed emotions _stay or run? Stay or run?_ I chose to stay Elizabeth is a great cook. She makes heavenly cakes and cookies. I wonder why my mom never goes in the kitchen it's a very relaxing place to be. _She likes the conference room more than the kitchen. Right!_ I need to sleep. Edward want to take me to Paris tomorrow. Apparently he called Patrick who was so devastated when he heard about our courting, to inform him that I will be absent in a few days. My bags are packed. I mean, my bag is packed. Only one yes. Edward said we will be buying our clothes there. But I brought a dress and shoes just in case. Wish me luck Diary, or a Miracle. Right? _It will all get better in time.._

Isabella

 **AN: I'm sorry, the story is 2 days late. My computer internet crashed. I'll try to upload 2 tomorrow. Read and review to let me know what you think!**

 **TWILIGHT IS NOT MINE**


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